Hello, life lovers! I’m baaaaack. Didja miss me? I missed you! 😀
Ha ha, now I’ve gotten that silliness out of the way, it’s great to be back. I was getting lonely offline.
That said, my hiatus did me a lot of good. Highly recommended if your head feels too full or you can’t hear yourself think anymore.
Before I go any farther, I should say that I didn’t attend any Zumba classes or sip hot cocoa at Starbucks. I didn’t even make any new friends. I know, I know! That wasn’t the plan, right?
Well, it wasn’t exactly something I could help. I pushed myself hard for so long, I didn’t even realise I was running on empty. My health was a lot worse than I thought; I spent a month in hospital due to a crisis, so that kinda changed the tangent of my time away.
However! Yes, I’m better now and hopeful I won’t have to go back again. Apparently, keeping a brave, chirpy face online is a LOT to ask of myself at the moment. I focus so much on you that I lose sight of me. Yeesh.
Let’s tweak that a bit, yes? 😉
So while I didn’t spend my time quite as I hoped, I did spend a lot of time just being with myself. I discovered my own validation, and realised that now is not the time to fret about building a business, traffic stats, or any of that. Now is the time to breathe, heal, and just write from my heart. This is the first time I’m writing outside my journal since I went underground, so you can imagine how long it took me to even wanna write at all.
In case you’re wondering what’s up with my health, I’ve been in treatment for major depression and post-traumatic stress disorder for some years now. However! I rarely talk about it ’cause it’s sad and folks don’t know what to say to it, yeah? So I’ve got baggage and stuff, but I’m finally learning to release. Glory be. 🙂
Now, on to other matters. A couple of really cool things happened while I was away: I won 2 blogger awards! Well, not first place, but I made it into 2 separate groups. Oo-rah!
First up, Steven Aitchison’s Top 50 Personal Development Blogs of 2012. I didn’t think I’d get enough votes for this one, especially since it was right before the hiatus, so it rocked to hit #35! 😀
Sweet, huh? 😀
Next up is Brendan Baker’s Best Personal Development Blogs of 2013. I didn’t even know about this one, so it was an AWESOME surprise; I felt all famous and stuff. 😉 Great to be #98.
I’ll have the badges in my sidebar as soon as I win the tussle with my theme. Can’t seem to upload any images. 🙁 Ideas, anyone?
So the kudos were awesome because they confirmed that I really do make a difference. I’d begun to wonder why I bother at all since I didn’t feel like I actually connected with my readers. I guess that was just a low phase, huh?
More importantly, it’s not about reading every blog or subscribing to every newsletter in your field of interest.
It’s about going where your spirit purrs and you feel you’ve found a home.
It’s about reaching out to kindred souls and knowing you’ve left an imprint in someone’s heart.
Connecting happens for real when you set aside your social face and show up as you are: unsure; vulnerable; unique; and beautiful. When you’re brave enough to reveal your strengths and flaws, your quirks and foibles, your light and dark, then you’re truly alive. Then you’re linked to other people, giving those who haven’t stepped up yet the courage to.
So this is me, owning my highs and lows. I may not have followed my inital plans, but I did refill my well and discover what was right for me. What was needed. And that, my friends, was worth every minute of searching. 🙂
Many thanks to everyone who showed some love while I was gone; y’all rock! And to each of my new subscribers since December, thank you. I’m so happy to have you join my slice of the interwebs. 🙂
One last thing before I go. I dare you to empathise before you judge or put your own spin on someone else’s suffering. It’s OK if you don’t understand, but it’s NOT OK to downplay or dismiss whatever they’re going through. Your view of the world isn’t the only valid or true one, you know? Don’t be an arrogant know-it-all; it rankles. Empathyville is the place to be, yo. 😉